Discouraged, Part I

I knew that when I started this journey I would have some ups and downs.  Well, loyal readers, I was very recently feeling quite frustrated.

I've oft said that I wasn't going to get everything perfect, and that some things I would just have to take on faith as they might be out of my control (such as how organic is something labeled as such, and do I know that the cow who made the milk that made that cheese was grazing on grass instead of corn), but "perfect" is truly the ultimate goal.  You all, in the supportive comments you've made, have also encouraged me to be patient and focus on the journey.  But a week ago I found myself wondering if all my efforts are, in fact, quite futile.

In the most recent round of business travel I spent 3 days in Philadelphia for a conference.  Conference travel, while still exhausting, is better for the Au Naturale lifestyle than my typical running around the countryside from school to school.  I'm in one hotel the whole time and actually have time to go to a restaurant and eat a decent meal.  Philly was no different, and the most I had to travel each day was from my hotel to the convention center a block away and back.

Situated in between these two locations is Reading Terminal, an old train depot converted into a market.  Up and down the aisles you can find purveyors of everything from chinese food, crepes, and philly cheesestakes to seafood, fresh produce, and crafts.  Members of the local Amish population have stands here, too, selling meat and eggs and baked goods of all sorts.  When I was told about this depot of goodness, I thought I had found a local and convenient way of maintaining my Au Naturale focus (because what is more Au Naturale than Amish-farmed foods?).  But, as always, nothing works out as perfectly as it seems.  My only day to simply wander around was Sunday, so all the Amish stands were closed.  The produce market had things like tomatoes and bananas, which you know none of were grown in early March in Pennsylvania (not to mention that the bananas looked like hell).  I waited in the world's longest line for a crepe and while watching the crepe masters expertly assemble those things in record time, I wondered if they sourced their fillings locally or shipped them in from god-knows-where.  Add this to the pre-wrapped sandwich I got earlier at O'Hare which didn't even an ingredient label, and it was enough to drive an Au Naturale girl crazy. How do I know where these things are from? Do I just go ahead and assume that the milk in my morning latte was probably from a corn-eating cow who can stare at a pasture but can't access it?

At first part of me said- once again- "okay, you slipped a little but you were on the road! You did have dinner one night at an organic/local-focused restaurant.  You'll be good as new as soon as you're back home."  But let's be honest: I am always on the road, or meeting someone at a restaurant, or eating at someone's home.  This is not an anomoly in my schedule-- this is regular life.

And so my dispair began: What is wrong with this picture? Are all my efforts in vain? I don't want my food choices to be complicated- is that too much to ask?  I just want to eat basic and whole foods. Am I not looking hard enough for alternatives in places like O'Hare or is it truly a whole foods desert? Why is it easier for our society to succumb to the processed items than the natural foods that are already there and ready for us to eat? Do I give up? Do I stop eating at restaurants?  I don't want to revise my expectations.  Or, am I thinking too hard and having too little faith in what is good out there?

Before you all stop reading this post because it's so whiney (or maybe you already have), please know something: I started writing this post over a week ago, during the height of my despair.  I came home, read up a little in "The Omnivore's Dilemma" (which could have been contributing to my paranoia and dispair, perhaps), and decided that maybe I just needed to take a good, long look at my mission, vision, and actions.  Perhaps I had gone into autopilot?

And then I thought of the old tried and true axiom: Keep it Simple, Stupid.  Think basic. Think things that say organic, small farm, and local- and if not available, things that are just one or two ingredients.  Eat things that are not in a package so you don't have to overanalyze. If stuck, just nosh on a piece of fruit or something- the simplest item around. And if you do end up eating a little that is processed, trust that the mechanisms in your body are advanced enough to know how to clear out the junk.

And then I started to cook and eat. And with each step I felt a little bit better.  So what kinds of foods helped to ease my blues?....